It used to be France's best kept secret, but now the word is out....so let’s tell you all about it.
Cap d'Agde is the world’s most hedonistic town, we’ll just call it Cap from now on. Situated in France, on the Mediterranean sea, about 100 miles from the border between Spain and France, it is the sea port and beaches to the old town of Agde in the Languedoc region of Southern France. This is not a hotel, or a small resort, or a beach….it’s a town! The typical holiday season runs from May to September, with apartment owners doing decorating, and hardened naturists doing trips outside these dates.
You can drive through France, normally takes around 14 hours from Calais door to door, so a relief driver, or overnight stop is recommended. You can take longer ferries, say from Portsmouth to Bilbao, Northern Spain which takes a day/night and gives you a good break, leaving a 5 hour drive at the other end. You can train down from Paris easily, direct into Agde which is then 20 mins taxi ride into Cap. Or you can fly from numerous airports around the UK, into Montpellier (1 hour transfer), Carcassonne (45 mins transfer) Perpignan (1 hours transfer) or the closest Bezier (15 mins transfer). There are plenty of English ex-pats living in and around Cap that offer taxi service to and from, just make sure you get a licenced, and thereby an insured operator!
One quarter of the town is separated from the rest by a massive fence with barrier controls to gain access. This quarter is naturist and has been for the last 50 or so years. You can obtain a pass at a front office, for which you’ll need full ID, passport, driving licence, and often they ask for a membership card to a naturist organisation if visiting as a single male. You’ll need to arrive before 8pm as the office is then closed. The area does have a problem with local lads trying to get in later in the evening which they slowly seem to be getting on top of.
Once inside the barrier, you will find nearly everyone is naked. Within minutes it will feel totally normal, trust me, it’s very difficult to walk around with a constant hard on, so forget that myth, you’ll feel totally at home. It worried about your body, don’t be. You will see everything here, big, small, scars, fat, thin, post operation, disabilities, transsexuals, infact it’s almost like everyday life without clothes…what a surprise! No one cares here. Many have been coming for years, why should they change their lifestyle just because of an operation, or accident. People love Cap because there is no discrimination. Having no clothes on brings us all down to the same starting level, and we all accept each other.
The quarter is exactly that, it’s a quarter of a town, with roads, shops, a port, thousands of apartments, hotels, pubs, restaurants and clubs, a beach, campsite, park area, even a protected nature area. A busy day in the summer, expect 22,000 people to be present. You need to note, this is a naturist resort. You will see folks in their 90’s, and families with babies in arms. Kids running around on the beach, so be very careful about what you do and where you do it! Also be aware that many locals live and work here, it’s their life, and they may not be naturists, so will be dressed. Shop owners, bar staff, cleaners, bin men, delivery guys, etc. will all be clothed normally. It’s the tourists who strip. Once in the resort the normal dress code walking around is flip flops or sandals as footwear (yep, they have cats and dogs roaming so you need something on your feet) and a sarong around the waist, or naked. The sarong is used in all bars and restaurants, no one wants to sit on a seat that has just been sat on by a naked person, so everyone uses a sarong or towel to sit on where ever they go.
The town has a number of very distinct areas or building complexes. The first one, and most obvious to mention is Heliopolis, a massive horseshoe of 5 floors of apartments, sea facing and at the heart of the quarter. Shops, bars and restaurants can all be found, best examples are the Green Bazaar that sells almost everything you’ll need for the beach, the Spar for most foods, 1664 bar for the open air evening drinks and people watching experience, and a resort favourite Gymnos restaurant for a quick snack through to the perfect steak, fast furious, and superb food. In the middle of Heliopolis you now have the lovely Jardin d’Eden hotel complex, alongside the famous Glamour swingers nightclub. (You’ll find numerous swingers clubs around the resort, plus one BDSM club).
In-between Heliopolis and the Port, is Port Ambone, another circular complex of apartments, with shops, bars and a couple of clubs. Again, good food shopping, clothing stores a plenty, and everything from a quick pizza café to port side dining experiences.
From there you have Port Nature, a massive T shaped complex of apartments leading right down to the beach. It starts with the famous Melrose bar, a must stop experience for hedonistic couples late evening. Moving on you’ll find restaurant after restaurant, serving everything from Sushi to superb steaks, crepe bars to cocktail bars. The main destination for folks during the evening time, and the centre for what everyone calls the “parade”, the nightly show of costumes and erotic lingerie, as everyone wanders around town in their finest! (yep, you do get dressed up in the evenings, dress to kill, we take more clothes to Cap that any other holiday, as every night you’ll want to look spectacular!) At the beach end of Port Nature you have another complex of shops and bars. The favourite with the English has recently changed hands, so Johnny Wokkers pub, is still there but now in French ownership following the retirement of Johnny and Jen after many years. Pizza bar, Snackies, and a few basic shops underneath, and then lovely restaurants up top. Try the popular Le Mississippi restaurant, or relax with a cocktail on the balcony at L’Horizon. All have superb sea views, and if lucky enough you’re in the perfect spot for the monthly fireworks on the beach, and evening sunsets.
There is also Port Soleil, on the far side of the port itself, quieter, without any real clubs, and only a few restaurants, it’s ideal for the more laid back break, although apartments can be a lot smaller than elsewhere.
Cap has a massive campsite. You’ll need to book, it does get very busy and is often sold out, so be prepared. Caters for everything from 1 man tents to juggernaut size campers. You’ll see some with a tent and a bike, others with Jacuzzi’s in their awnings! The site is run by a company called Rene Oltra and you need to book with them in advance. Wristbands are given out and security ensures only campers get in and out of the site itself. If meeting friends from inside camping, you’ll need them to come to the gates to collect you. Parties are frowned upon in this area as it’s very popular with families, so we’d always suggest you party elsewhere. There are plenty of toilet blocks throughout the area, with lovely facilities in most of them. Power points at every pitch, and chemical disposal points all around the site. A few shops near the entrance, plus other stuff such as a kiddies play zone and aerobics classes always seem to be on throughout the day.
There are also more and more hotels popping up, mainly near the entrance, or just outside the gates. These can be expensive but provide superb facilities, if looking to totally relax and enjoy the holiday. Search for Hotel Eve, Oz Inn or Natureva Spa for on-site hotels, as well as Jardin d’Eden already mentioned above.
So, a typical day at Cap, (based on life as a swinging couple) probably starts around 10am, when you wake, slip on your flip flops, and nip along to the local bakery. Couple of croissants each, a cup of killer black coffee, maybe an orange juice, and you’re ready to face the day. We also normally grab a baguette as well and make up a sandwich or two for the beach, as food is expensive around the town, but that’s a personal choice. (If staying for a week or longer, see if your taxi guy will stop at Hyper-U outside the resort on arrival, for a main shop and fill your freezer, it’s a lot cheaper than in the town itself, don’t forget the wine as well). Then it’s back to the apartment to breakfast, and sort out the kit bag for the day out.
The next bit can be weather dependant. If at all windy, you need to avoid the beach. Plenty of poolside places if you get out early enough, so look out for Waikiki in Port Nature, and one in the centre of Port Ambone. Both charge for entry or sunbed use, but are well worth it for a day out of the wind. The pool near Johnny Wokkers is now a swingers club, so be aware if you sunbathe in there, you’ll get to see some discrete action going on, on lilo’s. Also has playrooms below ground. Damn fine day out.
If fine, no wind, then head for the beach. Cap is blessed with perfect sand, and a flat, straight beach line. From the port entrance, heading East, you have over a mile of perfect naturist beach. Most is family orientated, so wander along until you see a beach bar, café, and lifeguard post on the top of the dunes. This point marks the start of what is accepted as the swingers beach. The next few hundred yards see’s hundreds of swingers, very few if any children, and a fair number of meercats!! I’ll explain that in a minute. As the swing section dies down it becomes the gay section, before eventually the beach becomes “Textile” again, or clothed, at Marsallian Plage.
Find a space for your towels. This in self becomes harder the later you leave for the beach. By 2pm you’ll be sitting on someone else’s knee almost! Towels often overlap, and walking between them during the height of the day, on burning sand, is an art in its own right! If you don’t want to be in the middle of all this, just go back down the beach a few hundred yards and you’ll find only a few folks between you and the water’s edge. You’ll find regular stall holders selling cold soft drinks, coffee, baguettes, ice creams at the water side, as well as a few sellers on the beach trying to shift sarongs, chains and necklaces, or serving coffee towel side. The water itself can be cold. The later in the year it is, the warmer the water becomes, but expect an icy edge to it in May, but lovely by August. Take a deep breath and run in, its lovely. Very clean, and although the temperature shock can be a surprise to most, within minutes you’ll probably be able to get erect if given the right company! You will find play in the water surprising easily and accepted by those around you. If you look like you’re up for fun, expect to draw in a crowd very quickly. These guys don’t muck around, a gal playing is often seen as a green light and within a minute you can have a 100 guys around you. They do observe the rules, normally, but we have seen incidents where the guys need to be told. If you don’t want this amount of attention, just stop playing and they’ll all vanish as quickly as they appeared.
Back on the beach you’ll find play going on all around you. It’s not legal, so don’t expect a full blown orgy, just gentle play occurring between couples in the open. The lifeguard station often fills with local police during the day, so do be careful. If they start to approach the area a whistle normally sounds out from everyone so play stops and the police back off, but you do need to play carefully. This is where we meet the meercats. The beach has been here for a long time, and the locals certainly know about it. Single guys are everywhere, in-between all the towels, wandering around looking for play to watch, often stopping, dropping to the sand to watch a couple at play, and will lie at your feet wanking away without a care in the world. Some real hunks, many older, if you like singles, this is the place to pull one and get to know him better before the evening. Most speak English! Expect an offer of a massage for the lady, at least to re-apply sun cream, and enjoy, no one cares here.
Around 6pm most evenings the police and lifeguards call it a day….the beach is now yours to have fun on. This is when the famous “circles” start to form. As a couple start to play, maybe alone, or with others, groups of guys, and couples will start to congregate around them very quickly. If a good show, then if you’re sitting nearby, expect your towel to be trodden into the sand very rapidly, it can be a bit of a stampede. The circles can get to 20 deep, with well over 200 folks all trying to get a peek of the action…does get a little crazy but if you have the balls to be the centre of this attention, you’ll never ever forget the experience! Once done, expect a very polite round of applause…you see, they are all gents after all. By 9pm you really need to be off the beach unless very brave. Plenty of stories of incidents after this kind of time, so be warned.
Gather up your possessions, drop off your litter at the bins please, and slowly head back to the apartment, taking in a quick drink at one of the many bars. Shower to get rid of all that salt and sand, before aperitifs on the balcony, crisps, canapés a bottle of wine shared with new friends as they wander past your frontage is the start of a good evening. Many will do balcony parties, drawing in 20 or so friends as the start of a party night, music blasting from each location giving the entire complex its own rhythm.
A liberal dose of after-sun should now be applied and allowed to soak in before, “dressing” for the evening. Now is the chance to show off that gorgeous see through dress, that lovely latex outfit, or leather strapping. Dress to kill, you can’t and won’t shock anyone, trust me they’ve seen it all before, but you stand a chance of making an impression on someone! And now, its parade time. Taking your partners arm, or even better, the arms of two or more partners, you start to wander around Cap. You walk past all the bars and restaurants, allowing everyone to take you in in your finest. Enjoy the moments, each longing look you get, catch as many eyes as you can, you never know if it may turn into more! Pick your restaurant to dine at for the evening, then pick the seat, ideally one where you can watch others drift by, and admire their efforts. Watch out for the tigers, that will be us!
Enjoy your food, enjoy the local wines, the area is superb for quality reds, take in the sights, and decide on how to spend the rest of the night. The main bar for couples opens around 10pm and is Melrose in Port Nature. Table top dancing and plenty of music is the order of the day, with singles excluded to the walkway around the pub. Expect to see the sights displayed openly, as girls gyrate above you. Then head for a club. Plenty to choose from, from the famous Glamour on the seafront, to its competitor a few hundred yards away, Tantra, or Jules below Waikiki pool, or the Hammam (sauna/Jacuzzi) in Port Ambone. All charge around 35 Euros per couple, which includes free drinks on entry. All, apart from the Hammam, discourage singles, so you’ll need to find a playmate on the beach to get into these clubs if touring solo. The fun dies out around 4am for most, at which time you can drift back to your apartment, taking pity on any of the singles who line the route home if you wish. Expect to see police and security these days around the complex. Singles are often asked to prove they are staying in the resort after dark, as locals seem to infiltrate the resort and do cause a few issues late at night. Be warned, opening your curtains and having sex in front of anyone walking by can be very erotic, but also very awkward if caught by police! You will be arrested.
A few major attractions to look out for. Glamour club opens throughout the afternoon for its superb Moose Party. This is foam, poured in from above on the dancers below. Bar blasting out classic rave music, often solo drummers or sax players. All naked and having fun in the bubbles. Also there’s the new pool parties at Babylon, a complex at the back of the resort, where around 300 couples meet during the afternoons for fun in the pool. Car rental in and around Cap is easy if done in advance, although the area is limited to vineyards and beaches unless travelling to the old Roman town of Montpellier. Also try to visit the old town of Agde itself, its lovely and the river has some superb boat restaurants. Take a bus out from the resort, (bus stop at the security gate entrance) to Cap d’Agde centre, where you’ll find hundreds of great shops and outdoor markets. Try the pleasure boat cruises, the river trip is lovely, as is the trip along the coast…you even get to perv at the naturists on the beach at one point. It’s quite a giggle watching all the tourists trying to zoom cameras in on the beach!
That’s just about it. Enjoy your holiday. 2 weeks is almost perfect, long enough to get a good tan, short enough not to get to bored. You’ll then be ready to repeat year after year. The rest of the world yawns by comparison if your main interest area is sexual. Get to learn the tricks. Find people who own apartments, and miss out the middle men when booking. Find a great taxi driver as you can always then get a lift out of town if needed. Work out which club is your favourite and see if they do regular user discounts. (You can get a year’s ticket to Glamour by attending on New Year’s Eve for example). Get to work out where to buy 5 litre jugs of wine, far cheaper than by the bottle, and most is ideal for party nights! The holiday is probably about 20% more expensive than a similar holiday outside the resort, but if you know the tricks, it can also be 20% cheaper!
Welcome to swingers paradise.
If googling, names to search for as well as all of the above are: AGN, Peng Travel, Dave and Ann Agency, Cap Nat, Resid. If you feel anything needs adding, or altering to this overview, please let me know.